


Are you real or part of my mind?

by PerhapsImAKlepto



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa 3: The End of 希望ヶ峰学園 | The End of Kibougamine Gakuen | End of Hope's Peak High School
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Cuddling, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hallucinations, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Komaeda Nagito comforting others for once, M/M, Makoto isn't doing so good, Naegi Makoto being comforted, Naegi Makoto has PTSD - Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Not the author sneaking in one of their favourite songs, Post Side-Future, Psychological Trauma, Singing, Singing to Sleep, Trauma, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-07
Updated: 2021-01-07
Packaged: 2021-03-18 09:49:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28616097
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PerhapsImAKlepto/pseuds/PerhapsImAKlepto
Summary: Ever since Naegi saw the despair video the hallucinations started. Komaeda finds his boyfriend crying in the bathroom after a bad episode.
Relationships: Komaeda Nagito/Naegi Makoto
Comments: 4
Kudos: 82





	Are you real or part of my mind?

**Author's Note:**

> I forgot to save this the first time and rewrote half of this and i'm very annoyed at myself  
> Anyway i thought of this idea because barely anyone talks about Makoto's trauma and i like hurt/comfort.

Naegi shifted in bed, trying to ignore the whispers that filled the air, trying to ignore the shivers crawling up his back, trying to ignore who he knew was in the room. Ever since his second killing game, they had started. Being a test dummy to see if the theory was true and subjecting himself to the horrors of the despair video. The heavy weight had cracked him and hallucinations started to appear in his daily life. They started small, like one of his old classmates (looking seemingly normal) appearing in his dreams. Then they got worse, psychical hallucinations of his dead classmates- no. His friends appearing around in his daily life, saying the same thing over and over.

_"Why are you still alive, Naegi?"_

_"You should've died instead of us"_

_"Join us, Naegi"_

_"Naegi.."_

The brunette jolted up in a cold sweat. His hands violently shook in front of him, his body sticky from cold sweat and face damp from tears. Another nightmare. He felt gross. He hated it.

Naegi turned to look at Komaeda. The fluffy haired man was laid down next to him, sleeping peacefully with his arms wrapped around his pillow, slightly drooling onto it. Naegi let out a shaky, quiet laugh that followed with a nervous smile. He leaned over and pressed a damp kiss to his forehead, hoping he wouldn't wake him up from how tear drenched it must've been. Quickly and silently, he staggered out of bed.

"I wonder if you experience anything like this anymore, Nagito"

He quietly opened the bathroom door and flicked on the light. Shaky hands fiddled with the tap until it started running and somehow successfully cupped a decent amount of water into his hands. He splashed it onto his face in an attempt to clean his face of tears. Hazel eyes then glanced down at his arms and the lines that laid on them - some were fresh and some were old and fading. During his old killing game, whenever he had the chance to be alone is when he would drop the optimistic mask and let in drops of despair that loomed over him - _that_.. was the only way he could find any solace during what he argued to be the darkest time in his life. He laughed a little, supposing his old habits must've been creeping back up to him. He knew Komaeda hated it when he did this.. Komaeda..

Komaeda.. the strange man he called the love of his life. He was always there for when Naegi needed it, comforting him during his hallucinogenic episodes, nightmares or even when he picked up a knife to relapse. It always made him feel like a slight burden to an already heavily traumatised man - he couldn't imagine the pain Komaeda felt when he wrapped bandages around fresh cuts. The albino has told him about his past and what has happened, and Naegi made it his duty to love and care for Komaeda as long as he lives. It made him happy to do so, however he still felt that his own trauma was giving Komaeda more emotional baggage than it should.

He looked up from the mirror, letting go of a sigh he didn't know he was holding. Suddenly, he froze up and stared at his reflection in horror. Behind him in the shower he could see her - Maizono. She was laying there, the blood splattered on the walls and the knife in her chest. Her eyes were open and looking Naegi dead in the eyes. Maizono stood up slowly, walking so she was behind him and placing her hand on his shoulder.

"You're still alive?" She said, her sing-song voice ringing through the brunette's ears.

"Stop.. y- you're not real!"

"I'm not real Naegi-kun? Then why can you see me, why can you feel me?"

Naegi dropped down on the tile floor, bunching his hair in his hands as Maizono continued to talk down at him. Tears pricked at his eyes again and a sob escaped his throat. It hurt. Why wouldn't she go away. She wasn't real. She wasn't real she wasn't real she-

"How do you know if you're real, Naegi-kun?"

_..what?_

"H..Huh?"

"Maybe this is all a dream and you'll wake back up in the killing game?"

_Was.. I real? Was anything real? Was.. Nagito real?_

"Maybe you should find out, Naegi-kun"

"No- no- stop.. s- stop it! You're not real!" He yelled, repeating himself like a broken record until he drove his voice hoarse, "Get away from me!"

* * *

Komaeda groaned, opening his eyes and blinking away the sleep that showered him. A yell cascaded from the bathroom and the albino jumped out of bed, realising the voice belonged to his lover. He swung the door open and skidded down onto his knees. Naegi was in front of him, shaking, crying and still yelling out. He must've been having another episode.

"Makoto" Komaeda said, calmly, "It's me.. Nagito.. I- I'm here okay. I want you to look up"

The brunette looked up, tear stained hazel eyes swirling with oncoming despair. He looked like a mess.

"Tell me your name.. I- It's okay.. take your time"

"M..M..Makoto.."

Naegi hiccuped, gripping his hair with aggressive vigour as he tried to snap out of the state he was in with the aide of Komaeda. 

"How do you know if he's real, Naegi-kun?" Maizono said. He began to shake more violently, looking at Komaeda and accidentally shouted out at him.

"H- How do I know if you're real?!" 

Komaeda flinched, making Naegi let out a gasp.

"S- Shit I'm- Ko I'm-" 

The albino smiled calmly, "It's okay Makoto.. listen to my voice"

Slowly but surely, Komaeda managed to bring Naegi down to a state where he could talk easier and that it was safe to touch him without flinching.

"I..I'm so sorry Ko.."

"Please don't apologise Makoto! You were in a state you couldn't control.."

The brunette silently nodded. Komaeda opened up his arms and the smaller man went into them, allowing himself to be picked up and taken out of the bathroom. Komaeda flicked off the light and sat down on the bed, cradling Naegi in his arms. His tears fell onto the fluffy haired man's shirt as he moved closer to his lover. 

"I won't let them hurt you Makoto.. I won't let them hurt my hope"

Naegi let out a small laugh at the petname he's came to enjoy. Komaeda smiled at him, pressing a gentle kiss to his forehead. The brunette smiled a little, holding onto the fabric of his boyfriend's shirt tightly as he looked up at him, watery hazel eyes no longer spiralling and now dawning a certain tiredness that Komaeda recognised all too well.

He began to softly hum, Naegi relaxing into his hold. A song that had been on his mind for a few days was the one he chose to lull his hope to sleep with. Humming evolved into quiet singing.

_Guess there is something, and there is nothing_

_There is nothing in between_

_And in my eyes, there is a tiny dancer_

_Watching over me.._

"-ah..."

Naegi had fallen asleep with a smile on his face. Komaeda smiled, gently laying the smaller man next to him and pulling the covers over them both. He brought Naegi back to his chest and securely wrapped his arms around him, like a silent promise he'd protect him. He could hear soft snoring coming from him that was almost akin to a purr - the fluffy haired man laughed a little, kissing his forehead once more before closing his eyes.

"Goodnight my clover.." He said, sleep catching up on him quickly, "May hope shine through in your dreams"

**Author's Note:**

> Not me sneaking in Ricky Montgomery because I love his music


End file.
